I keep forgetting the old saying, "life is a journey not a destination." Instead, I keep saying, "once this milestone is reached, everything will be better/easier/happier, etc." And then I forget to enjoy the crazy moments and embrace the chaos.
I have a count on my calendar so that I can keep count of the days we have spent waiting for our approval from China. We are on day 43, by the way. Only 1-40 more days to go! But once we reach that goal, once we have our Letter of Acceptance (aka Letter Seeking Confirmation) we will begin the countdown for Travel Approval. Then the countdown for the travel. Then the countdown for gotcha day. Then the countdown for flying home. Then the countdown for maybe just one more?... it never ends.
So here are some of the parts of our journey that I don't want to forget...
The friends- the adoption community is amazing. I have met so many amazing people through adoption groups. They get it. They go crazy during the waits, they celebrate the milestones, and they pray for and advocate for the thousands of sweet kids who still need a family. Not to mention, they shop and nest and dream of their little one on the other side of the planet. They struggle...files are lost or inexplicably given to a different agency. Sometimes their dogs eat important documents and gift packages for their child get lost in the mail. They know that when you get set back a day, it isn't JUST a day. It's a day longer you have to wait before you hold your child.
Kid moments- my boys are busy being boys. They fight with each other, help each other, and grow and learn new things every day. Jacob's new favorite phrase is "go away" which he learned from his big brother. It's always fun to hear it as I am chasing him around after bath...he's dripping water, squealing and shrieking "go away, mommy." Thankfully we have moved on from his Frozen phase. I don't know if I could have taken hearing "Let it Go" one more time... although, it was a good reminder to let some things go. Adam is reading and becoming more independent. He takes toys away from Jacob, taunts him, and then sits patiently and reads him a story or helps him put a puzzle together. He is a great big brother... sometimes.
My husband- Todd is so patient when I tell him about the kids who have grabbed my heart and the stories of other families who are now home. He's there when I am pulling my hair out because dinner is on the verge of burning, but Jacob needs to be held and Adam's computer game has locked up and he needs to use the bathroom but doesn't want to go all by himself. He hunts. He cheers for college football and makes kefir which uses up all of our milk and stinks up the counter... he wakes me up early on Friday mornings so he can go to breakfast with his friends. He is a huge part of my journey.... can't think of anyone I'd rather be with while navigating life.
Church- we are members of the best church. Seriously. All I ever talk about is the adoption, but they listen and smile and ask questions. I hear little anecdotes about the boys from their teachers. I help out with the 2 and 3 year olds once a month... Oh, the things they say!
So today I am not going to forget. Today I am going to enjoy the journey. I'm not going to worry about getting "there." I am going to enjoy be here.
